CCullen
by aMomentInTime
Summary: Each turn leaves you just as lost as the one before and love? it consumes your broken beating heart missing the one you belong to and just wanting to feel again.
1. Chapter 1

She plopped herself into the arm chair rubbing her temples as her mind simply wandered from place to place where could he be she thought it had been too long this time brining her current focus to the calendar on the wall sketched with a portrait of their happy family Edward's idea of course 12 months dedicated to us and he had been gone for 4.

With a small coo and a cry Bella came back to reality Renesmee was sprawled out on the floor with every toy imaginable yet her eyes were glued by the door ten tiny little fingers grazing against the wood with a look back with her bright eyes "dada" she cooed "dada" focusing back on the door plopping her body flat against the floor "dada"

How could she feel anything for herself leaning forward with a sigh forcing a smile "dada will be home soon pumpkin dada will be home soon" rising from the chair picking up her sweet angel. If she only believed these words she's been spreading the last couple weeks if only she could forget Edward her and Renesmee both.

Charlie emerged from the living room Renesmee in hand with a grin wide as the sea. "Papa papa" she clapped and sang "dinner dinner" Charlie chanted back.

Bella stood there her black dress clung tightly to her skin smoothing it over 6 months 10 days lord knows how many hours minute's seconds. His picture seemed to glow from the nightstand "she'll be one you know one years old and you won't see it because you ran off because you stopped fuck your heart of stone" her tears ran down her face as the picture laid in piece upon piece. Regaining composer she walked out the bedroom skimming past Charlie "I'll be home straight after dinner" she spoke without one look he knew her pain and he talked about it way to much placing a kiss on Renesmee 's plump cheek "love you ladybug" snuggling her close.

And that's when it all goes black the pain overcomes her body and it plays once more over and over again.


	2. Chapter 2

"The beeping someone stop the beeping" She swore she was screaming but no one answered her clearly just a thousand mummers but never any words. It may have been hours or days she didn't know but the beeping the noise how it drove her insane.. Just one word though the blackness just one sound even Renesmee's sweet cry. Just like that came the strongest voice though the mummers "her heartbeat is strong you have no need to worry any day any moment" then the mummers got louder and though the darkness came hope and with that hope came the bright.

It must have been morning the sun sang though the windows in vibrant yellows and oranges filled with anticipation Bella quickly went to prop herself up with that came the pain a loud groan and the most handsome man in the door way. "It appears I'm kind of stuck here" looking up bashfully at who was clearly a doctor.

"You were in an accident" his voice roared thru any noise and the world it stopped still. "you've been in a coma your family has been here your father and your sister" Bella let out a smirk "oh you mean my lady bug" placing her head back on the pillow a smile drawn happily on her face.

The doctor moved to the monitor checking her vitals looking down at her "and what does this lady bug look like? Red body black spots?" Bella gave him a look he eyes squinted "No she is beautiful almost flawless with a smile that will warm your heart, my daughter Renesmee "

"I'm Carlisle" the doctor said with a grin "I'll be your doctor for the rest of your stay here" placing his cool hand over hers with a grin "now get some sleep dear visiting hours start in a couple and your father will be here 8:28 on the dot"

Just like Charlie she thought Lord knows he tried to be there right at 8 but to get him ready would bring us to 8:10 but Renesmee to a smile once more crossed her face watching Doctor Carlisle leave that's when she felt the pain she wasn't sure if it was her bandaged arms or her aching heart. She realized he didn't speak of another man the man that took her heart and ran with it. Closing her eyes tight she drifted off to sleep the only place she had the hope of seeing Edwards face.

"Bells" and then came "Momma Momma" Bella opened her eyes wide looking up at her beautiful girl "awwww Renesmee baby I've missed you" Bella cooed

"Well nice to see you to Bells" Charlie echoed

"You to dad what happened" She seemingly whispered

"You left and about 3 hours later I got the call that you were here, you never went to dinner Alice was worried sick no one knew what happened what u remember"

Bella look shocked "If I did why I would ask you"

"Listen bells it's been hard I know this" Charlie's words just slipped into the mummers "Dad" she voiced "enough"

Charlie nodded and that was the end of the conversation. As Carlisle reentered the room.

"Hello again Doctor" Bella smiled

"Helllllo" Renesmee mocked

With that Carlisle smiled "hello miss ladybug" putting out his hand Renesmee wrapping her hand his finger. Bella loved the smile across Renesmee's face and caught her staring at the handsome doctor long after he had let go and brought his attention to his patient of course.

"It appears you have 2 broken ribs and a concussion you're very lucky it wasn't worse Ms. Mason"

"Ms. Swan" Bella interrupted almost immediately bringing her eyes past the doctor over to her father who simply nodded like always. The Dr. simply took out his pen and obviously scratched out the last name with a slight grin quickly covered with professionalism.

"Yes well Ms. Swan you are very lucky indeed I will return later on to check your vitals and arrange a discharge" With a close of his folder he was gone again and the world it sped forward from the stillness every time he spoke.


	3. Chapter 3

The sun painted the white walls again when Bella woke up her eyes focusing on the room around her looking for a trace of Edward. A trace of anything a rose or a lily he knew her favorites. He knew how to make his presence notable even when he wasn't there. She must have sighed much louder as she faced out of the window than she thought because almost immediately Carlisle entered the room.

"My my now there's sleeping beauty how are you this morning Ms. Swan"

Bella kept her stare out the window "I am good doctor thank you for asking"

He could sense her lost voice her sad demeanor unlike the morning she awoke the first time. She had been so hopeful so ready to see her daughter and now nothing just a blank stare our open window.

"I am arranging your discharge tomorrow morning 11 am your father has already been notified"

Another soft sigh escaped her lips "Doctor?"

"Yes Ms. Swan" Carlisle answered

"My farther... he has been the only man to visit me here correct?"

The seconds seemed to pass like hours he understood now there was someone else the ring clenched in her small fragile hand when she arrived should have been his first clue. But not another soul had entered this room

"No ma'am" he spoke solid and firm even though inside his heart broke for her "Just your father Ms. Swan"

"Thank you" her voice fell faint focusing back outside as a tear ran down her slim cheek. She watched him turn around silently exiting the room. The way he moved caught her attention it was effortlessly sudden, just like Edward. It was possible her heart was simply getting the best of her but she continued to watch so intently that she was sure.

The day past the same as each day she had been in room 348. Past 8 Charlie arrived with Renesmee, then it was lunch, more time a brief walk to the sun parlor and time to say goodbye. Accept tonight Renessme sang "Momma comes home tomorrow Momma Momma Momma" as Charlie carried her under his arm out the door.

Home she thought, of course Charlie made it clear how was the guest room adjacent to her childhood room for her and Resnemeee to live and grow. They both knew it was the end of the life she shared with Edward her love, her secret she could never say or ask if he was ok to much was at stake. Propping herself against the pillow she thought of the family Edward spoke so briefly about the one he left years ago to be with her.. Could he have possibly gone back to them?


	4. Chapter 4

Carlisle sat at his desk filling out the papers for Ms. Mason or Ms. Swan whatever name she was intending to go by. Something about that women's presence moved him she seemed so familiar to him yet so very distant she couldn't place it he couldn't place her but what he knew was that angel she called lady bug was nothing like herself.

Could it be possible he pondered thinking of the girl they called _Renesmee beautiful auburn hair and brilliant eyes the color or her skin everything about her screamed what he knew oh to well. But Bella, Ms. Swan she wasn't like him what was going on here. _

_He let his thought get the best of him while he commenced her pile of paper work. Her file gliming from the desk corner. He was a doctor so looking over her past records would be far from a crime. Yet someplace he felt horribly wrong as he skimmed thru her pages looking for the delivery of the baby girl no older than a year. But there was nothing not a word not a doctor's visit absolutely nothing. Ms. Mason, Mason… The name rang into his ears like the church bells on a Sunday morning._

_When suddenly his eyes grew wide spinning his chair to face the far left wall. His family portrait hung slightly to the right crooked and dull from the years of sunlight draining to color from his families already lifeless faces "Mason" he murmured "Edward Mason" focusing intently on the son in the photo, the son he has lost so many years ago._


	5. Chapter 5

Her last morning in this place, she loved the mornings thou it was a new day a new hope by night it was nothing more than another day passing another missing piece. Today she woke carefully judging her aches and pains as the clock ticked softly. It was 8:00 going home at 11 she said aloud then remembering yet again what home really meant. Charlie had made it clear that everything she needed was already in her new room. She felt like a kid again moving out of her home to her mothers in Florida everything new and foreign accept this was just a new time and everything was just as familiar as years before. Rising from the bed she made her way to the chair placed in the corner carefully facing the full garden past the window "I never made it out there" thought Bella aloud.

"Well there's no time like present time" came the Dr.'s strong voice from the door frame

"No fun wandering alone" Bella replied without thinking. Carlisle approached closer placing his strong hand on her shoulder she spun quickly facing him "I'll accompany you" he said with a devilish grin.

There was another word spoken Bella stood flattening her sweat pants and hoodie with a small groan. She was still sore from her broken ribs. Carlisle exited the room first she hadn't noticed his dark jeans and sweater wondering why he wasn't in his typical white lab coat but she couldn't say she minded.

The garden was much prettier and lighter standing in it. She and the doctor took the bench in the corner under the tall willow tree "pretty isn't it" he said. Bella nodded looking around "it's beautiful" Their conversation sparked from that talking about the weather as most do. Bella relaxed it was nice having someone to speak to other than her father who didn't ask all the questions and didn't watch her every move like she was going to hurt.

Then it came.

"How old is your daughter?" Carlisle spoke from the routine conversation

Bella swung her feet back and forth focusing on the pavement "She'll be 1 this weekend" she knew she should have lied there was no way he would believe her but why should she lie to him when he has yet to lie to her?

"Wow, very impressive especially the way she speaks and her size" Carlisle face was unmoved not challenging her. Bella motioned her eyes back and forth bringing sense from the situation clearly he was far from stupid why was he buying into her? Maybe for fear of what he himself would not be able to explain.

"Where did you have her? I noticed no mark on your record"

Bella looked over to the flowers tilting her head back slightly "At home" she whispered

"Your doctor?" He asked slightly more accusing than before

"My ex-husband delivered her" Bella's focus was blurry all her anxiousness overcame her she wanted to run to fly but there would be no use.

Carlisle nodded reaching out across the bench grazing her hand as he watched it quiver. His touch over hers was cool like Edwards she must have jumped because the look on the Doctors face was confused and shocked

"I um I'm sorry I just wanted to.. I think I should go" Carlisle stood up walking in the opposite direction he came in.

Bella just sat there her blurry thought coming into focus as the sun gleamed at her eyes. She didn't look up as the doctor walked away she didn't even speak. He knew what she knew but did he know she knew what he was. She took in a deep breath and a soft sigh. A weight lifted from her shoulders as she walked back to her room but she had no idea why.


	6. Chapter 6

Carlisle felt his feet fly from underneath him the pavement becoming a distant memory as each step turned in feet and each foot a mile. His focus was more blurry than the night in his office he was always so clam and collective yet nothing seemed focused in he had lost all control. The woods grew thick around him his walking became running his running faster than lightening. He didn't stop until he reached the creek nothing became clear until he submerged his every thought into the ice cold water.

The water flooded his thoughts icing over the ice in his veins. Bella, Bella, Bella Edwards's wife the one he had left for. The one that he swore they would never understand when all they wanted to do was keep her. Edward feared the vulturie and he always thought he could simply do everything on his own. With a loud sigh he pulled himself back up to the shoreline head in his palms. This whole time he knew Edward was close but never knew how close Edward was his first before Esme.. This was the first time he had thought about Esme her own betrayal as poetic as his sons. She left their life behind but for Edward to leave a child? What son had he raised?

The questions turned and spun around in his mind over and over. His memories his thoughts overcoming him overwhelming him but then thru the fog of everything he was attempting to clear came her beautiful broken soul her half broken smile and the beautiful baby girl who would never come to know anything like herself. He worried for Bella and for Resnemme she would become strong and Bella vulnerable. But how to tell this girl what he was, when he could be completely and utterly wrong. With that a thud came from the bottom of his chest his eyes traced the sky above feeling something he swore he would never feel before when the venom flooded his body. Love, he whispered when I am as cold and dead as they come. He assured himself it was mere responsibility for that beautiful baby girl in order to give her a life that his son has taken….

The night became morning so quickly by the creek he moved past the woods making his path clear to the hospital. His lab coat was in his office so there would be no suspicion from anyone seeing as he went completely unnoticed the night before and Bella was sure to be gone by now. The hospital was like normal but he felt this life inside of him as he paced the hallways to his office passing 308. The bed was neatly made standard looking nothing special like the life she held she was gone and he felt empty. With a shake of his head he continued past his secretary who held out a note with a crooked smile scribbled on the front "Carlisle" with a nod he took it from her hands opened his large oak door slamming it shut opening it hastily.

"My name is Bella Swan 2 years ago 29 days ago I met the man I knew I would love all my life. He gave me breathe and life even though he was lifeless himself. My heart beat for both of us, I loved him I love him. He left everything he knew to protect me and created a life just for us He was never meant for me he was never meant to be mine. But he gave me this gift my beautiful daughter she is my greatest heart my greatest joy he could never see that in her she was always a monster. The thing that almost took me from him the horrible reality that I would never lead this normal life he longed for me. June 2 I woke up alone with this empty feeling like something had been pulled right out of my chest I swore my heart beat was gone. I knew the moment I heard Resnemee's cry echo from down the hallway the house was empty. There was never a goodbye he was just gone. That feeling that emptiness it disappeared the moment you entered my room the moment your voice overcame my eardrums. As soon as you were gone it knocked me down all over again. I know your something unlike what I am, I see it in the way my daughter looks at you. I don't know the line or clan that your type follow but maybe just maybe you know my Edward maybe he is with you and sent you to me. I may just be crazy, but I know who you are well more so what you are please, don't leave me behind"

-Bella Mason Swan

He rose eyes tightened shut as he grasped his forehead his pace inhuman his fist flying glass shattering as his family picture crashed to the floor.


	7. Chapter 7

Her hand shook as the tears streamed down her face each word she wrote down in the paper hurt her print curving an winding just like her feeling. The last thing she scribbled Carlisle exiting her room to the puckered face receptionist who didn't even look up when she stood intro t of the desk with a dull tone "this is for doctor Cullen"

The air seemed denser she breathed easily as she slowly exited the hospital the lights were far to bright making her tears glisten she felt like the morning she woke up alone yet airy.. It may have just been the feeling of being left of leaving something behind. Ether way there was a thud soft and inconstant right where she used to have a heart.

Charlie didn't speak at all the ride home Renesmee cooed to the voices on the radio Bella just stared out the window eyes focused on the yellow lines. She didn't think of Edward not for a moment Carlisle was drawn inside her brain his face his sweater and jeans she let out a small chuckle and the rest of the car fell deathly silent and Charlie gave her a look he looked relived an they pulled up into the driveway.

Charlie was right everything had been very not so expertly placed in her and Renesmee's room. Charlie had let her alone placing down lady bug for a nap Bella stared out the window "at least this isn't my old room" Bella thought out loud

"didn't want to take you back to that place bells" Charlie had place himself in her chair while Bella was turned away.

"I guess that place was always where I was meant to go dad"

Charlie spoke to often and about something's and never about others. He knew Renesmee was different. But never a word he knew Edward was different but that was to many words.

Charlie cleared his throat "I spoke with hank the paper to finalize the divorce are on the table"

Hope rose from her voice "they you found him?"

"No bells it's called abandonment no one can seem to find him. I'm sorry but he is gone"

He was gone without another word Charlie never felt the need to stick around for the emotional stuff. As for Bella she slipped down to the cool floor clutching her knees. Swearing to herself this would be the last teardrop Edward would get from her.

The morning never seemed to come she must have drifted to sleep for a moment because all she could hear was the shrill laughs of Renesmee and her farther?

Bella laughed herself pulling her body out of bed staring out her window. The air was hot and muggy and Charlie must have taken a couple days off because in the yard laid a small kiddie pool overflowing with water and a grown man having much more fun than Renesmee could ever. Bella walked over to the night stand pulling out her swimsuit oddly happily jumping into making her way outside. Bella descended the stairs quickly

"this is our new life" she seemed to chant "we're going to be just..."

Bella swung open the front door silencing her aloud thought process "fine..." she murmured quietly looking at the handsome doctor merely a foot I front of her.

"Oh! Carlisle! I mean Doctor Cullen." Bella covered up her body with her arms "please come in..."

He entered the room in more of a dignified fashion than casual just like he walked around the hospital nothing different she wondered what this meant stuttering out

"may I get you a drink"

"no thank you" Carlisle replayed in a professional manner

"your note" he continued Bella tensed up waiting for more

"you note struck something with in me. I am truly sorry for the pain brought on to you by my family"

"family?" Bella looked up confused

Carlisle cleared his throat "please let me finish"

The world spun out of control as Carlisle spoke of finding Edward teaching him how to be what they were and when Edward left the family. Not once did he say who or what they were what she knew they had come to be. But she assumed this was merely an unspoken agreement and he listened fully.

Bella didn't even notice she was crying until Carlisle moved forward carefully brushing away the tear on her cheek.

"Bella sweet Bella" he whispered his eyes glued on hers her heart fluttering a small grin drawn on her face.

"mommmmmy mommmmmmy" came the screaming wet Renesmee running in from outside. Charlie right in tow. They jumped away from each other looking over to where Renesmee stood

Renesmee looked up at Carlisle and without a second thought went right into his lap jumping up the water flinging everywhere from her wet bathing suit

"Renesmee no!" Bella directed

Renesmee just looked up a Carlisle putting get five little fingers on his cheek smiling

Carlisle froze looking down at the little one placing a soft kiss on Renesmee's forehead

"I believe I should be going" Carlisle rose up

Bella stood almost instantly. Carlisle noticed the look of disappointment on her face

"tomorrow at 6 get u and that little lady bug dressed and ready it's a date"

Bella watched him go out the door jaw on the ground

Charlie was blushing for her as he scooped up Renesmee without a word as she sang out "date, date"


	8. Chapter 8

Carlisle was no sooner home when he was making the reservations at belle mer he chuckled at his own wit Bella belle he wondered if she would pick up on his play of words. For Bella was definitely the Bell of his ball.

Shaking himself back to reality he calmly picked out his clothes for the next evening. He thought of Bella, he thought of _Renesmee_and when he thought all his thoughts were banished in came his beautiful Esme.

She flew thru his thoughts her auburn hair shining off his shoulders so prefect without flaw his true beauty his true love. She was gone now he would remember the morning like yesterday when she descended the stairs past Carlisle with a short "goodbye we both knew it would end this way" the clicking of her heels firm against the tile of the floor entering the _Volturi_'s black limo.

They once had a house full of love with eachother but as their children dispersed as did their love for one another Esme mostly. Edward leaving is what broke her hard he never could make up for his son. Accept now; now he had this chance for everything that had been stripped from him all in the hands of dear Bella. Bella Bella Bella his new light and _Renesmee_ his little love he swore he felt his heart thud as his head hit the pillow. Nights like these he wish he slept for to dream of her would bring them closer until the time lapsed.


	9. Chapter 9

5:30 Bella danced around the room with Renesmee as the music played twirling around her little princess as the sun began to set exploding her room with bright colors resembling flames. "I loved this room for this these colors" Bella spoke with Renesmee like she was truly listening as she pressed her own hand against the colors on the wall.

"dressed to go" Bella plopped Renesmee on the bed spinning herself around to pull up her own skirt and top. Spending a moment in the mirror with a wide grin as she focused on herself and Renesmee took up the corner of it herself with a matching smile.

With that came a knock 6:00 on the dot. Bella scooped up Renesmee traveling down the stair case to open the door. There stood Dr. Cullen in a sharp black sport suit "hello Carlisle" Bella spoke softly quaint and reserved even though she was grinning like a school girl inside.

"Hello Bella" Carlisle smiled "you look amazing tonight" leaning in planting a soft kiss on Bella's cheek as he scooped up Renesmee with a grin and she giggled.

"Now go finish whatever you need I'll take care of this one right here" before Bella could even turn around to grab her purse he had her in airplane mode zooming around the parlor crying out in joy. 

The ride to the restaurant was nothing less than amazing they spoke of everything minor the face value stuff both of which probably already knew of the other Renesmee kept her eyes on the window mesmerized by the lights on the streets. Bella couldn't remember if they had ever been out so late before and she knew it was true as Renesmee began to yawn upon pulling into the restaurant.

Belle mer how beautiful it looked from the outside so lavish yet dainty. There wasn't a single car odd for a Friday night accepts for those clearly belonging to staff with their perfectly lined up spots marked in yellow letters.

Carlisle was no faster parked than at her door opening it "my lady" he said with a smirk offering her his hand. With another moment he hand the sleeping Renesmee up and out of the car placed firmly yet lovingly in his hands. Bella's eyes widened as she snuggled up against his coat seemingly grinning in her sleep

"shall we?" Carlisle locked his arm and Bella slid right in without a word. 

"Evening Doctor Cullen" bellowed a host staff

"evening" Carlisle politely chimed back walking straight the table in the middle of the room under the glowing chandelier.

Bella seemed to pay to much attention to the similarities of all the staff. The way they moved, the way they looked, they way they already sensed her prescience and kept their eyes glued on Renesmee… Like every last one knew her.

Dinner was splendid they ate and spoke frequently and Renesmee didn't make one fuss as she slept deeply, calmly unlike anything Bella had ever come to witness before. Carlisle came closer placing his hand over Bella's like the day at the park. However Bella didn't jump she calmly grasped his hand in her smiling wide.

"May I ask you a couple questions?" Carlisle spoke aloud

At that moment she knew he was safe here for the tone of his voice wasn't suspisious, or hiding and no one turned a cheek while he spoke.

"mhmm" she mumbled her eyes glued on his face

"What do you know of us?" Carlisle scanned the room appeared like everyone was listening now Bella shivered and cleared her throat

"I know you are what they call the undead; I know my daughter is ½ of you and ½ of me. I don't know the company you keep but I know much isn't spoken of just understood"

Carlisle smiled and nodded

"I know I loved Edward" choking back her tears "your son, with my every breathe and I swore late at night I could hear his heart beat."

Carlisle looked uncomfortable hearing such tender words for the monster he had created. "And Renesmee" he spoke what do you know, how did you deliver her?

Bella looked up took a deep breathe in to let out some kind of secret

"I know she almost took my life from me in more ways than one. Edward left his family.. Edward left you to protect me from the Volturi from any harm and never forgave himself for the harm he swore he brought unto me. The moment I found out I was pregnant they were at my door. How they got their so quick I'll never come to know. But I guess you guys all move pretty quickly" She chuckled and smiled realizing some of her tension.

Carlisle was unmoved staring at her and back at Renesmee so she continued

"We explained to them what had happened, they deemed it impossible and wanted Edward to change me he refused they were cross with him but they said for him to suit himself for the child would come to kill me anyway. At that moment upon their departure Edward went wild he wanted to end it to rid myself of the baby I couldn't do it for I had loved her already even dreamed of her sweet sweet smile. The days went on and I grew furiously I was only pregnant for 9 weeks she grew as quickly as she does now. Before I delivered the Volturi came back astonished by my power and how I seemed unmoved like any other mother during pregnancy. They tried some things whatever it was I'm not to sure. Once again Edward lost it but nothing hurt anything they did seem to touch me. Once again they left remaining Edward that eventually he would have to change me and Renesmee herself once the time was right. However they seemed pleased with my existantance."

She finished her words looking up as Carlisle face moving toward hers. She paused wide eyed as their lips met and his heart she swore she heard beating.


	10. Chapter 10

And so it went the days became weeks the weeks became months and Carlisle's and Bella's life's they grew into each other like roses twisting and turn slowly bringing a new color to life.

Carlisles work was constant and steady Bella cared for Resnemee and worked host at belle mer. Bella soon realized the worker were members of carlisles family everyone knew her story it was heaven really never to speak for everyone to simply know. Resnemee spent her time with Lilith the youngest cousin of Carlisle so to speak and roselie they taught her new things as she grew feverishly she was almost 2 now but easily 5. She changed her abcs and 123s and even started to read.

Bella found joy in Resnemee life and love in her carlise. Every move he made she followed she truly loved him with every last being of her heart. Charlie was happy with his girls happiness he basked in Carlises demenior and enjoyed the way Bella loved such a good man. It was no secret his defecate for Edward but happiness it seemed to live here.

One night Bella made her way down to the hospital to surprise Carlisle. She snuck away to his office as he made his rounds and proped herself up in the corner. She never thought she would be here the first time she had entered. She never thought her life would come to be consumed by his. Yet it was the most powerful feeling she had yet to come by this type of love of a life time taking aside every feeling she held for Edward sweeping her off her feet into a whril wind of bliss and happiness like she had never been hurt like she could never be hurt again. Breaking free from her thoughts gazed out the window she turned slightly to see the dark room had a sudden gleam from the floor as Carlisle knelt romantically with a diamond brighter than the stars. "I love you Carli" she whispered falling against the floor wrapping her arms tight around him.


	11. Chapter 11 Carli

Carlisle heart raced as soon as her shadow was clear eight feet ahead of him. She was so lost in her thoughts he was pretty sure those were the moments when he loved her most. His hands grew sweaty and shaky as he place his knee against the floor fumbling in his jacket pocket with a solid beautiful diamond ring. His mothers and though Esme had once wore it he was sure his intentions were clear. Within a moment Bella spun around meeting his hopeful eyes and the gleam of the ring steady in his shaking hand. In that moment she was around him kissing him hugging him and Whispering yes over and over. He had found his heaven and there wasn't a single person who could take that away. His lips met hers breathlessly as her excitement grew her clothing shed peeling of her dress as they kissed still Whispering yes with every short breathe and moan.

Carlisle swooped her up to his desk undoing his pants propping her up as he slid in and against her pushing forcefully yet tender kissing her softly sparingly as he made love to his bride to be. Her moans excited him burying his head against her full breasts sucking them fondling playing with her entire body. His body pushing into her at a steady pace kissing her skin nibbling her neck softly until her blood oozed out gently laping up her wound he became more forceful pleasuring her hard her moans growing louder as he exploded within her continuing to pump as she squirmed underneath him. So beside the noise of the heels against the tile. Carlisle focused himself to his doorway he knew that sound the sound he heard the day she left. As Bella finished Carlisle started back up his pace loosing himself in thoughts of Esme shamelessly caressing Bella as Esmes face drew over her body.

…..

The next morning nothing seemed right Carlisle's memory faded in and out. He kept trying to piece together the puzzle pieces of last night. Bella, the ring, Esmes memories. They surrounded him took over him all before he even had a chance to turn over. As he did there she was his beautiful Bella her long hair spread out upon the pillowcase sleeping peacefully so unaware and blissful he wanted to keep his life this way. But when he came to shut his eyes there she was again her tall tan figure his angel his Esme her tall heels always postured against the floor. She was unlike anything he ever had before and he had come to create her just that way poetic soft and seemingly loving. But the past is who you are entirely and it always finds the way to rear its ugly head in the present. Esmes life was hard there was no doubting she needed to rip apart someone's life as had been done to her. Carlisle fear is she would always come back to tear apart happiness that grew outside her.

Bella's soft grunt broke his thoughts leaning over kissing her softly. That's when he noticed the brushes aligning her clavicle his bites scattered on her neck line down to her chest. In a fury he tore back the covers tracing over her stomach and hips not a section of her was untouched last night her body made that clear. Carlisle met her eyes fear struck inside him. "Bella Bella are you ok?" Bella moaned softly as her eyes flung open planting a kiss on Carlisle opened lips "morning love" Carlisle face stood frozen scooping her up into his arms rocking her gently showering her with kisses "my sweet baby I am so sorry" Bella face changes automatically focusing on herself feeling the warmth from her cuts and the numbness from every bruise "Carlisle" "Carlisle" she repeated

He didn't answer he had nothing to say his head spun wildly Esme's voice taking over Bella's words

"carli"

Back to reality he spun  
>She was tearful now her eyes pleading.<p>

He pressed his hands against her face looking up silently. He kisses her lips softly a she collapsed against him her heart racing. He could see her face recall the pain of her past, watching him leave right out that door, the scare Edward forever left on her.

& when words meant everything he fell silent.


	12. Chapter 12

What should have been happiness fell into fear as the diamond gleamed against her pale bruised skin. Carlisle laid "asleep" soundly. During the night he thought so deeply intact she called it sleep hours could pass before he came back to reality. It bought her plenty of them as tears streamed down her face. It wasn't often she left Resnemee with Charlie, maybe twice she had slept aside Carlisle curled up against the fabric in his arms. Tonight she wouldn't sleep, she wouldn't move. This was bliss, she remembered this feeling.. Just as much as she remembered it going away. Her body ached in a dull pain a reminder of their amazing night together. Never before did such passion arise between them Carlisle was cautious as Edward but the feeling as soon as he pressed against her bare and cold drove her wild. Smoothing her hands down her front resting her palms aside her belly button. She thought of the miracle of Resnemee and how wonderful a baby, her baby, their baby, a beautiful boy? No girl. Would bring to her life. With that thought she drifted away and dreamt of two darling babies racing around her grown Resnemee the boy Bella's very reflection and the girl all the features and light of her father.

As she dreamed her heart beat strong and happily and she smiled. Carlisle rolled over watching her touching her. Instantly she woke up from such bliss to his face. Her Carlisle so calm a collective so simple yet the look he gave her was everything but. His eyes were sad and shocked even lost and longing. Bella pushed away for she remembered that look. Carlisle scooped her up mulling over her body kissing her the look never leaving his face a word no leaving his lips and as she clung to him begging silently for something nothing ever came. Silence deafening silence as he moved around her body, rocking her as I it calmed her being while her stomached turned. Something was wrong and her assumption was only confirmed when he silently kissed her cheek standing up the bed and the roaring engine moments later.

And he was gone just like the others, wordless, reason less. Bella clang to the sheets and sobbed.


	13. Chapter 13 Goodbye

He drove faster than ever before his expression blank as every emotion flooded over his frozen veins. There she was again clouding his every thought. He loved Bella and he loved her beautiful daughter but Esme she held this power over him he couldn't explain. She was cold heartless against the world but he like that about her. So stern and unforgiving when Edward left her hatred focused on him but when the house was full she was lively attention seeking the life he breathed.

Carlisle continued down the path of black and white Esme and Bella they were so different yet they came to fill his heart just the same. The miles drew on and on and disc ions they had to be made. The snow covered the road like a firm blanket the shore came up to quickly and when there was nowhere left to drive descions had to be made. He couldn't bear to leave her Bella the way Edward had but to go on loving her would simply kill her no matter how this hurt.

The car reared out of park moving forward to third gear swerving in and out of traffic headed for the city to the airport on a plane to the city of the Vatican to see if one moment would make or break his lifetime. His whole life he lead the path chosen for him the right way to go tonight he was looking forward at himself and there was no turning back.

The sun crested over the buildings all tall and old full of life and arcutecture from beyond even his time the thought made Carlisle chuckle. Finding his way off the plane down the runway past the airport gates moving into the city streets. The streets were cobbled stoned thick only taken over by four or five cars that moved slowly down the roads with great time spaced within the other. It was 4am December 12th he was gone, he had gone back to his true love and every thought of Bella vanished from his mind in this city where he knew Esme he could find. "She had a way of destoring all happiness that didn't belong to her" he thought aloud this thought he had thought so many times before and here he was allowing her to overcome him just by the thought of her.

So he walked, moving against the sidewalks like he knew every turn and had been here a thousand times before. Though the gates of the Vatican he passed no one would think of such horror, lifeless creatures like himself would be found in such a holy city. Moving though the shadows to the golden doors where he placed his cool hand on the metal that swung open like she was waiting all along they knew Carlisle would come.


End file.
